How do I sum up decades of life in only a few short paragraphs? I don’t want to bore my reader with incidentals and rhetoric. However, I must write something or my sister, who is looking after this site for me, will probably reach through the telephone line and across thousands of miles of Canadian vastness and choke the living daylights out of me. (I’m her oldest sister, you know.) I wish I could just say, “I came, I saw, I conquered,” but that summation has already been used.
What do my readers want to know about me, I ponder, a quizzical expression confusing the staff at our local Edo restaurant. (I come here several times a week to write during my lunch hour.) They never ask me what I’m doing sitting with my laptop open at a corner table. They probably couldn’t care less. These days, it seems as though everyone is tap, tap, tapping at some device during every spare moment of the day. Why should I be any different?
So, to begin…my favourite colour is blue. I like to use Canadian spelling in my books, but I’m often forced to remove ‘u’s left and right by vigilant line-editors. I like dogs and cats, though we only have a cat right now—how is it that everybody who can’t keep their cat thinks that I’m such a soft touch that I’ll take their cat until they can find a place that allows them to arbitrarily remove that cat—now a beloved pet—and leave my husband and I looking like two deer caught in the headlights?
My favourite food is…well, to be blunt…my favourite food is meat. That’s right, I’m a meatetarian and proud of it! Give me meat or give me death! Steak…roast beef…chicken wings…pork chops…sausages…bacon…oh, yes, thick cut bacon….I feel like Homer Simpson. Don’t get me wrong, I like the other food groups too—my favourite veg is asparagus—yum. My favourite desert must be chocolate mousse, followed closely by sex-in-the-pan.
Okay, this is my fifth paragraph. I think I’ve revealed enough about me—maybe too much for my vegetarian and vegan readers. I believe I’ll close this with listing a few of my favourite authors: Georgette Heyer—of course! Amanda Quick and all her pseudonyms; Terry Pratchett—who doesn’t? Julia Quinn—boy is she funny! And Jasper Fforde—the man’s a nutcase but in the very best possible way! There are too many more to list so this will have to suffice for now. If there is something particular you want to know, ask me on facebook and I’ll probably tell you because my life is an open book, dontchaknow?